“I used to scream until I lost my voice; but now I stand quietly
I always sat in the front rows; but it doesn’t draw any attention to sit in the back
I used to curl my hair laughing as loud as I wanted; but now I tie my hair back and cover my mouth
I was never afraid of anything; but I can’t even climb trees anymore
I used to love so many things; but I can’t remember how to enjoy them anymore
I used to share stories; but I ran out of new ones to tell
I used to perform all the time; but now my hands shake when the teacher looks at me
I used to have so much love for everyone; but I forgot to save some for myself”
– Growing up means losing a part of who you are
“The words that people throw at me make me feel so empty
If I could just remember how to feel, I would tuck those words away
And bring them back out on the days where the rain never stops pounding
But I’m living in a rainstorm that’s so cold my body has gone numb
And those words mean nothing to me
They could light up someone else’s world
But to me
They are just words”
“I can’t explain this exhaustion with words that you will understand
I just feel like the ocean has pulled me under
And I don’t know which way is up
I only know that the water is still surging over my head
I feel as if I’m running to a finish line that was never really there
I get within a mile and it moves father away
It’s a finish line that I was never meant to reach
With water in my lungs and legs heavier than lead
All I can hear is ‘but you slept for so long’”
“The things you say to me should make my knees weak
I should love you the way you love me
Because you swear you’ll never leave
I want to feel something when you tell that I’m more important than a trip around the world
I wish my heart skipped a beat when I catch you watching me from across the room
You say all the right things
And the only thing I can think of that’s wrong with you is simple:
You aren’t him
I hear your words but I wish they were coming from someone else
I imagine the loving confessions slipping from his lips instead of marching from yours
I wish I felt something for you, but I can only feel when I’m around him
You say everything; he says nothing”
Not because of boots and scarves (though I do love sweater weather). I don’t love fall because of pumpkin spice lattes, corn mazes, or Friday night lights.
I love fall because of the feeling you get when the air is so cold it takes your breath away; when you can feel the chill in the air that warns “winter is coming”.
I love fall because of the smell of leaves on the ground and the satisfying crunch that surrounds you for only a couple weeks.
I love driving down a road with leaves swirling around the car.
I love fall because the trees show off their grandest outfits; the trees that so bravely shed their beautiful skins the colder it gets.
And most of all I love fall because we get to watch the earth celebrate the end of another year.
I used to sing a lot; around the house, in the shower, in the car, at the store, everywhere.